Posted by: Fern | January 8, 2008

Facebook Woes

This is probably a topic I should leave until I 1)haven’t drunk half a bottle of wine, 2)have more time to write and 3)have slept more than 10 hours in the past two days. BUT, I’m starting to think facebook will be the downfall of me. I go from happiness that I’ve found someone who I haven’t had contact with in years – which is a great deal of people, to a horrible bitter jealousy that they’re out drinking and having fun and I am married and have a baby, to distain when I see that it’s been six years since I last saw them and they’re still sitting in Bristol getting stoned with the same old people and going to the same old clubs.

I love my life, I love Declan and I love my husband, but I miss partying, I get upset most times I talk to my friends from college so I just avoid speaking to them, we’re in two completely different places in our lives so it’s hard for either of us to relate. I go through days when I kick myself for making the choices I’ve made, and other days when I look at what they’re doing and thinking just how much more rewarding what I’m doing is, how many of them can claim that they can recite episodes of Sesame Street verbatim of that the highlight of their month is sharing a bottle of wine with their mother-in-law! Overall, I enjoy what I do, I enjoy my day to day life, but I wish I could just forget everything for a weekend, go clubbing, get ratted, pull and experience the freedom and lack of responsibilities that my friends from college are experiencing right now.

Sometimes I would really like to take off the grown up hat and be a brat for 48 hours, just to get it out of my system 🙂



  1. any time you want to be a brat, you can be a brat with me.
    or we can crochet, too.

  2. Can you get a babysitter and go clubbing with Dan one weekend? Or if you have any girlfriends you can go out with? Being a wife and mother doesnt have to mean giving up the individual you are completely, although I do understand it makes it a lot harder. My social life has really picked up in recent months and its made me feel alive, so I understand where you are coming from.

  3. Bah, I get the same sometimes.

  4. Hey, maybe you should get a sitter for a weekend and DO get it out of your system.
    It helps, trust me.
    I don’t have the kids, but I was graving a good night until morning in one of my Favorite old Discos.
    I did it with my Best friend when hubby was already over here.
    I got it out of my system 😉

  5. We always want what don’t have. I love my life and my situation but I do sometimes wish I could find Mr right and settle down.


  6. I’ll be honest, I agree with what is said above.

    I feel that I’m missing out on a large part of life living at home and not going out, but if I move out (when I move out, should that be, I’ve had enough), there’ll be parts that I’ll miss.

    We can’t have it all, well, not at the moment.

  7. I’m sorry you’re feeling that way. 😦 If you can find a babysitter you’re welcome to come stay with me for a weekend. I’ll show you a good time out in the city – and I’m close enough that we can just stagger home if we have to. I’ve been living it up since T and I broke up. You’re definitely welcome anytime. I think a girls weekend would be a lot of fun – and it sounds like you need it. You know my number.

  8. It’s easy for us to forget the struggles we had on the other side of the fence. Do you not remember wanting to have what you have now?

    Easy cure: make a Girls’ Night Out once a week or once a month and stick to it. A friend and I do this for our attitude adjustment on Thursday nights…it works! The guys or babysitters watch the kids and we go to a fabulous restaurant and drink as much as is respectable…LOL!

    Hang in there!

    With friendship,

  9. I hear ya honey!
    I remember feeling just the same!
    I do agree with making a date once a month with some buddies and letting your hair down though. Don’t make excuses, find a way its worth it, even if you only go a few times. It might be easier to do a ‘lunchtime lushes’ thing if you are concerned about evening babysitting (less to do – feed, sleep, play etc then you’re back, even if a little wobbly!)
    If all else fails, I’m happy to babysit when we come over and you can go out with Dan or on a girly night or both, or we could leave the boys to it and paint the town ourselves!

    As an alternative you could have a girls night in – get Dan on Declan duty and low profile, have the girlies over for a bottle or two of wine, some great flicks and lots of the essential nattering – start early though and don’t forget the munchies!

    Lots of Love to you darling, you’re doing a great job!
    Jen 🙂

  10. Honey I’m hiring a beach house for a weekend for my 21st birthday in March – seriously if you want to hang out for a weekend with a bunch of nerds by the beach playing drunken wii and having laid back bbq’s let me know so I can drag you along. Have a think about it and email me so I can give you my contact details 🙂

  11. Thanks everyone!

    Morgan – I’ll get in touch with you about getting together this week/weekend?

    Vanessa – that sounds freaking amazing, I’m a little unsure about going for the whole weekend – I think I may have a breakdown being without Declan for that long, but I’d love to come and hang out and crash for a night! I will email you shortly!

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